Insecurity is not having a strong foundation. It’s lacking the strength to ignore people you don’t like, filtering out opinions that don’t matter. Because that’s really the point. Being intentional about who and what you listen to. Yourself? Others? Jesus? You are who you surround yourself with.
If you’re surrounding yourself with people that put you down or constantly criticize you, you’re going to lose your self-esteem and self-confidence. Not only that, but you’ll become like that yourself, constantly criticizing and putting down others. That’s not what Jesus has called us to be, guys. We’re supposed to uplift, not put down. Encourage, not criticize.
We cannot move past insecurity without Jesus. Jesus is that strong foundation we need to build ourselves on. With Jesus, we have the self-confidence and self-esteem we seek from others. With Jesus, we can uplift and encourage. We shouldn’t need others. We should have other people, yes. Two is better than one (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12). But that hole we feel, the hole we aim to fill with people’s approval, can only be filled by Jesus.
When we accept him, he starts to fill that hole, if we let him. It’s key there, the “letting”. We may have given him our heart, our life, but we haven’t given him control. Only when we give him control can he heal us, make us that new creation. We have to want to grow, to learn, to be more like him. It’s not magic, the prayer we pray to be saved.
You don’t immediately become perfect and cool and amazing when you become a Christian. It’s a journey, a journey that hurts a lot. I’m not gonna sugar-coat it for anyone reading it who’s not Christian. It’s pretty hard if you actively seek him every day.
Seeking him every day is like building your house on a rock. Your life is that house. He’s the rock. (No, Dwayne Johnson is not Jesus. Sorry guys.) When we go after him, we’re building the house on the right foundation. Reading the Bible and seeing his love for us is building on the right foundation. Hanging out with godly friends is building on the right foundation. When we do that we’re filling ourselves with God’s love, instead of insecurity.
We’re not supposed to be insecure. God wants us to be confident about our self image. After all, we’re made in HIS image (Genesis 1:26-27). When we talk down to ourselves, hating our bodies, we’re hating his creation, his image. Our bodies are a temple (1 Corinthians 6:19-20) and we’re supposed to take care of them, love them, as such.
And speaking of love, Jesus says to “love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:39). If we don’t love ourselves, how are we supposed to love our neighbor?
Love is key. Love is mentioned 551 times in the Bible! God wouldn’t have put that word in 551 times if it wasn’t necessary. So many times do we think that love is for other people. That we’re only supposed to show love to others. Yes, we are, but we’re also supposed to love ourselves. Not unhealthily or in a bad way, but true, pure love.
A man speaks what is in his heart. Luke 6:45 says “The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.” (emphasis added.) We can’t speak love if in our heart we hate.
That’s the root of insecurity. Hate. Thankfully, hate is just the flipside of a coin. That other side is love. We can flip that coin with a simple choice. We can choose to love. Choose to love ourselves. To love others.